KING LEAR
How now, my pretty knave! how dost thou?
FOOL
Sirrah, you were best take my coxcomb.
KING LEAR
Why, fool?
FOOL
Why, for taking one's part that's out of favour:
nay, an thou canst not smile as the wind sits,
thou'lt catch cold shortly: there, take my coxcomb:
why, this fellow has banished two on's daughters,
and did the third a blessing against his will; if
thou follow him, thou must needs wear my coxcomb.
How now, nuncle! Would I had two coxcombs and two daughters!
KING LEAR
Why, my boy?
FOOL
If I gave them all my living, I'ld keep my coxcombs
myself. There's mine; beg another of thy daughters.
KING LEAR
Take heed, sirrah; the whip.
FOOL
Truth's a dog must to kennel; he must be whipped
out, when Lady the brach may stand by the fire and stink.
KING LEAR
A pestilent gall to me!
FOOL
Sirrah, I'll teach thee a speech.
KING LEAR
Do.
FOOL
Mark it, nuncle:
Have more than thou showest,
Speak less than thou knowest,
Lend less than thou owest,
Ride more than thou goest,
Learn more than thou trowest,
Set less than thou throwest;
Leave thy drink and thy whore,
And keep in-a-door,
And thou shalt have more
Than two tens to a score.
KING LEAR
This is nothing, fool.
FOOL
Then 'tis like the breath of an unfee'd lawyer; you
gave me nothing for't. Can you make no use of
nothing, nuncle?
KING LEAR
Why, no, boy; nothing can be made out of nothing.
FOOL
Prithee, tell him, so much the rent of
his land comes to: he will not believe a fool.
KING LEAR
A bitter fool!
FOOL
Dost thou know the difference, my boy, between a
bitter fool and a sweet fool?
KING LEAR
No, lad; teach me.
FOOL
That lord that counsell'd thee
To give away thy land,
Come place him here by me,
Do thou for him stand:
The sweet and bitter fool
Will presently appear;
The one in motley here,
The other found out there.
KING LEAR
Dost thou call me fool, boy?
FOOL
All thy other titles thou hast given away; that
thou wast born with.
credits
from The Light and The Dark,
released August 16, 2014
Words: William Shakespeare
Vocals and Music: Derek Hunter
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