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To Woo a Shrew

from The Light and The Dark by Love Chaos

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THE TAMING OF THE SHREW

ACT 2, SCENE 1

PETRUCHIO
Good morrow, Kate; for that's your name, I hear.

KATHARINE
Well have you heard, but something hard of hearing:
They call me Katharine that do talk of me.

PETRUCHIO
You lie, in faith; for you are call'd plain Kate,
And bonny Kate and sometimes Kate the curst;
But Kate, the prettiest Kate in Christendom
Kate of Kate Hall, my super-dainty Kate,
For dainties are all Kates, and therefore, Kate,
Take this of me, Kate of my consolation;
Hearing thy mildness praised in every town,
Thy virtues spoke of, and thy beauty sounded,
Yet not so deeply as thou deserve,
Myself am moved to woo thee for my wife.

KATHARINE
Moved! in good time: let him that moved you hither
Remove you hence: I knew you at the first
You were a moveable.

PETRUCHIO
Why, what's a moveable?

KATHARINE
A stool, like this.
(she throws a stool at him)

PETRUCHIO
Then sit on me.

KATHARINE
Asses are made to bear, and so are you.

PETRUCHIO
Women are made to bear, and so are you.

KATHARINE
Not such a load as you, if mean you me.

PETRUCHIO
Nay, come, good Kate, I will not burden thee;
For, knowing thee to be but young and light.

KATHARINE
Too light for such a swain as you to catch.

PETRUCHIO
Come, come, you wasp; i' faith, you are too angry.

KATHARINE
If I be waspish, best beware my sting.

PETRUCHIO
My remedy is then, to pluck it out.

KATHARINE
Ay, if the fool could find it where it lies.

PETRUCHIO
Who knows not where a wasp does
wear his sting? In his tail.

KATHARINE
In his tongue.

PETRUCHIO
Whose tongue?

KATHARINE
Yours, if you talk of tails: and so farewell.

PETRUCHIO
What, with my tongue in your tail?
(She strikes him)
I swear I'll cuff you, if you strike again.

KATHARINE
If you strike me, you are not a gentleman.

PETRUCHIO
Now, Kate, I am a husband for your turn;
For, by this light, whereby I see thy beauty,
Thy beauty, that doth make me like thee well,

KATHARINE
Monstrous villian!

PETRUCHIO
Thou must be married to no man but me;
For I am he am born to tame you Kate,
And bring you from a wild Kate to a Kate
Comfortable as other household Kates.
Thou canst not frown, thou canst not look askance,
Nor bite the lip, as angry wenches will,
Nor hast thou pleasure to be cross in talk,
But thou with mildness entertain'st thy wooers,
With gentle conference, soft and affable.
And, Will you, nill you, I will marry you.

KATHARINE
I'd rather die!

PETRUCHIO
In sooth you scape not so.

KATHARINE
I chafe you, if I tarry: let me go!

PETRUCHIO
'Twas told me you were rough and coy and sullen,
And now I find report a very liar;
For thou are pleasant, gamesome, passing courteous,
But slow in speech, yet sweet as spring-time flowers.

KATHARINE
Where did you study all this goodly speech?

PETRUCHIO
It is extempore, from my mother-wit.

KATHARINE
A witty mother with a witless son.

PETRUCHIO
Am I not wise?

KATHARINE
Enough to keep you warm.

PETRUCHIO
Marry, so I mean to warm thee in thy bed,
And, Will you, nill you, I will marry you.
Why does the world report that Kate doth limp?
O slanderous world! Kate like the hazel-tree
Is straight and slender and as brown in hue
As hazel nuts and sweeter than the kernels.
Here comes your father: never make denial;
I must and will have Katharine for my wife.

credits

from The Light and The Dark, released August 16, 2014
Words: William Shakespeare
Vocals and Music: Derek Hunter

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all rights reserved

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Love Chaos Los Angeles, California

Love Chaos (Derek Hunter) has released 9 albums on Bandcamp:

- Black
- Love and Death
- E.I.E.
- Black Light, White Dark
- Life
- Waiting for Amanda
- Surrealist Saints
- Major Arcana
- The Light and the Dark

He has also written and published 5 books.

For more info go to -

www.love-chaos.com ... more

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